One day the girl I was dating told me she was getting into witchcraft. These words came out of my mouth: “Jesus is the most important part of my life.” What I really wanted to tell her was: “You can’t get involved in witchcraft you’ll bring demons into my life.” Jesus was certainly not the most important part of my life, I only said that because I was scared of demons.
Well, my girlfriend did end up bringing demons into her life. She would hear them talking to her, and she quickly became a different person just consumed with hatred. And we parted ways.
I went on with my life, and about a year later I was in the store about to steal hair product , something I used to do every month. As I held it in my hand, the words I told my ex-girlfriend the year before repeated in my head: “Jesus is the most important part of my life.” Standing there in Target I realized if Jesus really was God then I was evil! That if God is real then morality has to be based on his character. I didn’t want to be evil. My whole life I just wanted to be unwaveringly good like my Grandpa seemed. I knew I wasn’t as good as my Grandpa , but I didn’t realize I was evil.
I made a decision: I’d live as if Jesus was God for now and investigate Christianity. Once I disproved Christianity I could then feel comfortable returning to making life about me.
I made a decision: I’d live as if Jesus was God for now and investigate Christianity. Once I disproved Christianity I could then feel comfortable returning to making life about me. Well, it quickly became evident that the evidence isn’t even close. From a historical perspective alone, we have more solid evidence that Jesus rose from the dead than just about any other event from that time period.
After I finally realized all the evidence points to Jesus, it occurred to me that while, yes, Jesus doesn’t want me to be evil, it’s not about morality for Jesus. I realized that he died for me. He didn’t die so I would shape up and be good. He died so I’d have life. While I was still using him as a means to an end, while I was trying to include Jesus just enough so that I wouldn’t go to hell, he gave up his life for me. He knew that and died for me anyway so that I could live.
Suddenly I wanted to read the Bible and tell people about him. So, I did. Little by little everything wasn’t all about me anymore. Now I want to desire what he wants me to desire. I want to make my life all about him. So it is. And since I stopped chasing my own desires and started pursuing his, he’s given me real unshakeable fulfillment. I was made on purpose for a purpose and, just like an Xbox isn’t designed for hammering in nails, I wasn’t designed to be king of my own life. You can hammer a nail with an Xbox, but you’re going to destroy the Xbox.
When I bent the knee to King Jesus, I finally started to experience what I was made for. I no longer need to get my happiness or love or any other good thing from a person, thing, or feeling. I’m constantly given joy and love from a never-ending supply, and it doesn’t come from anything temporary. It comes from the eternal God who adopted me. I very quickly realized that Jesus’ messianic mission is completely Jewish. Since he is the long-awaited Messiah of Israel, the most Jewish thing I’ve ever done is to receive him.
Aaron Dranoff is the founder of thetorahguide.com . Aaron works to establish genuine relationships between Christians and Jewish people to combat antisemitism in the Church, teach about the Hebrew roots of Christianity, and lead discussions about the Hebrew Bible. Aaron also teaches high school history & geography and is a licensed commercial pilot.
